Life After Landing. What They Don't Show You in the Brochure.

This is the final post in this series.

Five posts about planning, applying, emailing professors, writing SOPs, calculating money. All of that matters. But none of it prepares you for what happens after you land.

This one is different. I'm not going to give you a checklist. I'm going to tell you what it's actually like, based on what I lived through, not what I read.

I left India in 2015. It is 2026. Make of that what you will.

The first month — more administrative than adventure.

Nobody tells you how much of the first month is just paperwork and logistics.

Setting up your bank account. Getting your SIN number. Registering for classes. Finding your lab. Learning the bus routes. Figuring out where to buy groceries that don't cost a fortune. Understanding your lease. Getting your student ID. Attending orientation events you don't fully understand yet.

It is exhausting and it feels like none of it is the reason you came. But it is. Get it done fast and right, because the second month is when the real work begins.

If you are aiming for a part-time job, apply in the first month. The process takes time. You want income starting month two or three, not month five.

Month two onwards — start thinking about graduation before you settle in.

This sounds counterintuitive. You just arrived. But here is the reality.

Most jobs ask for 3–5 years of experience. You are competing against people who have that. You don't. You never will while studying full-time, and immigration won't let you work full-time anyway.

But if you start building skills from month two or three certifications, relevant tools, small projects there is a real possibility of securing an internship in your second year, usually summer. That internship is worth more than any part-time job you will do. It is your bridge to your first real job. Do not underestimate it.

Make a list of what skills companies in your field are actually hiring for right now. Not five years ago. Now. There will almost always be gaps between what your course covers and what the industry wants. Start filling those gaps early.

Manage your time carefully. Commit to part-time work based on how much time you can actually spare, not how much money you need in an ideal world. Don't overstretch. You are in a new country. Your mental energy has limits you haven't discovered yet.

The lab — what nobody prepares you for.

If you are doing a research degree, your lab is your world for the next 2–5 years. Every lab is different. Every supervisor is different. But a few things are consistent.

Be ready to be independent. Nobody will hand-hold you the way you might have experienced in India. Your supervisor sets the direction. You figure out how to walk.

Here is one of the most practical things I can tell you: if your lab has 4–5 people, find the 3rd- or 4th-year PhD student or postdoc and quietly, respectfully, make them a semi-mentor. Not officially. Just naturally.

They work on the ground. They know which experiments actually work in your specific lab with your specific equipment. They will help you find a realistic first project one that has a chance of succeeding which saves you months of spinning in circles. 

But give them space. They are also students trying to finish their own work. Take their time gratefully, not for granted.

Don't compete with your labmates. In my experience, a good supervisor keeps projects distinct enough to avoid overlap. This is not accidental; it protects resources, protects productivity, and protects the lab dynamic. If you get insecure and start treating colleagues as competition, you lose allies you actually need.

Keep a lab notebook. Write down everything you try, everything that fails, everything that partially works. Failure is part of the process, but undocumented failure is just wasted time. Documented failure is data.

Warning: you will meet all kinds of people. Some will be helpful. Some won't. Some will seem helpful and aren't. Focus on your work. You are studying, working in the lab, working part-time, doing extra courses, cooking, cleaning, and managing your own life for the first time. You don't have energy to spend on people who drain it.

Homesickness — it will hit. Let it.

If you have never lived away from home, the first year will be harder than you think. Sleepless nights are part of the beginning. Accept that. 

Write your goals somewhere physical: a notebook, a wall, somewhere you see them. When everything feels pointless at 2 am, your written goals remind you why you are there. 

For me, sports and the gym were the way out of the dark moments. I won't tell you what will work for you I can only tell you what worked for me, because suggesting something I haven't lived would be dishonest. Find your thing. Exercise, music, cooking, running something physical, something that gets you out of your head.

Cultural clarity takes longer than you think.

Don't jump to conclusions about the culture based on what someone told you. Everyone builds their experience based on their own circumstances. What they experienced is real for them. It may have nothing to do with you. 

In my experience, cultural clarity takes 5–7 years. For some people, a lifetime. Be respectful. Be curious. Don't overthink it. Don't try to impose your culture onto others, and don't feel you have to abandon yours either.

Don't limit yourself to your own community. The comfort is real, but the cost is high. Go and work with people from different backgrounds. Talk to them. You will slowly learn to accept what you don't understand, and that is the most valuable thing you can develop abroad.

As for friends, real ones will appear naturally, slowly. Most people you meet in the first year are acquaintances. Some will feel like friends, but they are with you for a reason: a class, a project, a convenience. That is not cynicism. That is just how it works when everyone is equally new and equally lost. Being a little selfish with your time and energy in the early years is not a bad thing. It is survival.

Money — the thing nobody is honest about.

When you start earning your first part-time income, you will want to spend it. I did. Most of it, in the beginning.

The lesson I learned the hard way: if you borrow from someone you know and don't pay back on time, you hear things you don't want to hear. So first rule: don't borrow unless it is a genuine survival issue. 

Second rule: start saving as early as you can, even a small amount every month.

Third rule, and I know this will be hard to hear: don't send money home the moment you first earn something abroad. I understand the emotional weight of that. I understand wanting to help. But you are on the field. Protect yourself before you protect others. Having a financial buffer puts you in a better position to help in the long run. Times can turn unpredictable very fast in a foreign land. An emergency with no savings is a crisis. An emergency with three months of savings is a problem you can solve.

The job search — the part that humbles everyone.

I was lucky enough to get an offer before graduation. But I also started applying 6–8 months before finishing.

I stopped counting job applications at 50–55. Then I just kept applying. Numbers made me overthink. I applied for 1 year and 3 months before getting my funded PhD position. Then 5 months after finishing my PhD, I got an offer letter for my current role. I got 6–7 interviews. Some I didn't perform well in. Some I will never know what went wrong; probably they found someone more competent. That is allowed. That is how it works. 

What I can tell you:

• Start applying 6–8 months before graduation. Not 2 months. 6–8.

• Use all the job portals. Contact alumni; some will reply. A reply from one person can change everything.

• The immigration department will play a role in your career that nobody warned you about. If post-graduation work visa rules tighten, if the economy dips, if hiring freezes, you will feel it directly. Sometimes things go more smoothly, and opportunities come easily. You cannot fully control this. What you can control is your preparation.

• Don't follow the herd. People will tell you many things. Remember your goals. Check whether the skills you're building will actually be in demand over the next 5–7 years, not just right now.

• Spend on learning if you spend on anything. The right course, the right certification, the right guidance this is worth the money. Random spending when you're homesick and tired is not.

• Your knowledge won't go obsolete. Your specific technical skills might. Stay curious. Keep learning. That is the only real insurance.

Do I feel like I belong?

People ask me this.

Sometimes. But many times no. I wasn't born here. There will always be something I don't fully understand. And I keep moving cities, which means starting over each time in small ways. 

But I have learned to live with that. And living with it is not the same as suffering through it. 

I respect the countries that gave me opportunities. I am grateful. And I am also honest that belonging is complicated when you are an immigrant, when you move frequently, when you are building a life in a place you weren't raised in. 

Don't chase belonging as a destination. It is not a place you arrive at. It is something that quietly develops or doesn't, and either way, your life continues.

Would I do it again?

Probably. But what would I tell my 23-year-old self packing bags in Delhi? 

Honestly not much. I would want him to understand lab culture better, to know how to get the most out of every environment. But would a 23-year-old me have listened? Not sure. Some things you learn by living them. Some you learn from other people's mistakes. I have tried to give you the second kind in this series.

The takeaway I leave to your wisdom. 

When you are in the game, you play. You improve. You figure it out. 

Read what I wrote. Feel free to reach out. But remember it is your journey. Nobody else's plan will fit it exactly.

That's all 6 parts.

• Part 1 — The two routes. Agent vs planned.

• Part 2 — Finding the right university without wasting months.

• Part 3 — Writing an email a professor actually replies to.

• Part 4 — The Statement of Purpose. What nobody tells you.

• Part 5 — The money. What it actually costs.

• Part 6 — Life after landing. This one.

If even one person reads this and makes a slightly better decision, it was worth writing. 

If you have questions about any of it, reach out. I read everything.

📩 abhishakegoyal.com